The Dream Factory

14 days till departure

I arrived in Tel Aviv, from Kibbutz Yotvata, in January 2000. At that time, Dil To Pagal Hai was a hit. The title track was being played liberally on local radio. I was fascinated by the music. There was something so real, so authentic about it. I bought the CD and listened to it over and over and over. It made me dream of India, before I had ever been there.

Some time later, I had the opportunity to see the movie on DVD. It starred Shah Rukh Khan, the biggest star in Bollywood. It was long – three hours. And it took a very long time to make it’s point. But the point (which I soon discovered is an interesting matter of itself in Hindi cinema) was poignant: don’t accept an arranged marriage if there’s someone else you really love. If you can, marry for love. And you can. Dreams can come true.

This is a culturally sensitive point in India, where arranged marriages by far and wide are the norm. In most cases, this does not mean coerced marriages. When youngsters get to marriageable age (and this varies with social level and educational background) parents of the same caste and ethnic group confer with each other and set up introductions between prospective couples. In the end, most couples themselves choose their match. Clearly, this is not an easy decision, especially at a young age, and to be sure, implicit social pressure can be considered a form of coercion.

When you marry in India, entire extended families are tied by kinship. That’s why it is so important to know what kind of family you are marrying into. It also speaks directly to the point of what kind of life each can provide the other, especially in the case of the groom providing for the bride. Honor is involved. Marriage can be a vehicle for social climbing. More often than not, there is also the issue of a dowry. The bride mostly goes and lives with her husband’s family. Indian mothers can be notoriously jealous of their sons, and this understandably leads to friction between them and their daughters-in-law. There is a strong personage of the evil mother-in-law. Indeed, this is one of the abiding stereotypes of Indian cinema and soap operas.

Women can find themselves in a very vulnerable position, since it is frighteningly possible that they can be denied rights and opportunities at the hands of their husbands. Marriage is a one-way contract for them, since there is still an enormous taboo against divorce. And all the while there is pressure from both sides to make a good match in a timely fashion. India is a very tradition-bound and conservative society. As in other such countries, this characteristic is more acutely palpable among the poor rural masses. And while many sectors of the population have embraced forms of Western modernity, often the aspects adopted are selective, and the tradition-bound thinking is right below the surface.

And yet, India is also a cosmopolitan and multi-faceted democracy. India has the largest movie industry in the world. And with such a varied population, for a movie to have mass appeal, it has to speak to multiple audiences, often simultaneously. In most cases this is done with universal archetypes. This is a bit of an indictment. Nevertheless silly romantic fools like me can look for and even find meaning within such content, since it is presented in a thoughtful and intelligent manner. Above all, movies are entertainment. There has to be drama, and music, laughter and tears. In short, they have to engage you and draw you in, whether you are the university intellectual, entrepreneur, computer programmer, office clerk, factory worker, soldier, rural businessman, or poor farmer. And to both entertain and sensitively relay a social message to which people would otherwise be instinctively resistant, is in essence, the genius of the Bollywood film. And yet, most movie-goers the world over are looking for light entertainment, and sure enough there is plenty of that in Hindi cinema. But there is also more for those who are looking.

Once you overcome the initial foreignness of the medium, Hindi cinema is wonderful entertainment that also shows you a window of how social change is taking place in the world’s largest democracy. And many of the lessons, while not articulated in a way in which we are accustomed, can help us ask questions about ourselves and our own societies.

For years I have had this cockamamie fantasy about acting and dancing in Hindi cinema. One might even expect that given that I have what in all likelihood amounts to Israel’s largest collection of Hindi cinema DVDs. When I see the colors and the costumes and hear that film music, I imagine myself in the scene, being part of all that magic. Except that I’m crazy enough to actually do it, and write a book about the experience to boot! Two weeks from today I arrive in Mumbai. I know where the extra recruiters hunt for their labor. And I’ve got my smattering of Hindi. And I’ve got some pretty good moves for a white boy, too.

If I’ve come away with one lesson from the Bollywood ethos, it is to follow your dreams, even if you have to face down all the obstacles and prejudices that the world hurls at you in the process. Here goes.

Selected Farewell Party Photos

Thank You, Attunity Friends!

23 days till departure

Adeeb: Thank you for sharing your music and car experiences. You are the purveyor of my very favorite desserts!

Aki: They say that being able to listen is a great virtue. Let me tell you that being able to ignore is also one. Ignore those naysayers and fulfull your vision. You can and will achieve all that you've set your heart on.

Amir: I admire your professionalism. Congratulations on your apartment and forthcoming wedding.

Arie: You always have interesting stories and experiences to tell. You are a very multifaceted person - and also a wonderful source of information.

Arik: Thanks for all your patience. You set an admirable example of professionalism, and I wish you all the best.

Arthur: Heavy Metal, man. Who would have thought? Hang in there. I wish you much health and happiness.

Barak: I didn't really get to know you, but you are in great company at Attunity. Best of luck.

Boaz: Best of luck, neighbor. Thanks for being so friendly and helpful.

Costi: Thank you for making me feel part of the Support family. It has been such an immense pleasure working with you. You are the most dedicated professional I have ever met, and I truly wish you all the success in the world! Enjoy your new office.

David G: I picked you because you are an argumentative intellectual. For some reason, I don't regret it, either. Hang in there. Thanks for your patience on my Super Bitch days.

David H: I wish you had arrived sooner. It was so nice knowing that one phone call would solve all my technical problems. Thanks for all the valuable information as well.

Dotan: Go for it. Really.

Eloise: Greetings fellow bike-riding Anglo. Thanks for the baked morning surprises and all the recipes.

Dror E: Thanks for the laughs. And for not confiscating my car.

Dror H: Thanks for your patience. I think you're very stylish. Oh yeah, and a genius, too.

Dror R: I fondly remember those trips back to Tel Aviv. Good luck in all your endeavors. Watch your driving.

Erez: Among the very many things I admire about you, your unflinching self confidence has always stood out in my mind. Thanks for the help, the great conversations and the fun times.

Etti: Paddy cake, paddy cake, baker man; bake me a cake as fast as you can!

Gabi: I have a confession: sometimes I felt like "creating" technical problems just so you'd come by. Thanks for the Russian lessons and good times.

Gadi: I almost didn't give up smoking because of you. Take that as a compliment, because I truly enjoyed the time we spent in the stairwell. Thanks also for all the Thailand advice. We didn't meet there, but we'll meet again, I assure you.

Gil: Our professional lives became easier the day you arrived at the company. You have truly interesting and ecclectic taste in music.

Gilad: You seem to have a neat perspective on life. You are in great company at Attunity. Best of luck.

Hadar: You are the perfect fit for this company. You've jumped in feet first and surpassed all expectations. Thanks for all the help in the run up to my departure.

Hillel: You eat lunch late. And you always come up with the goods. It's been a great pleasure working with you. You cheer has been greatly appreciated. I'll always remember when your birthday is, too!

Ido: There's far more than meets the eye with you. You are a profound person and a stellar intellectual. Use it.

Igor: Samson's strength was in his hair.

Inbal: Soul sister: we started together and accompanied one another really from day one. I feel an immense sense of kinship with you and will really miss working together. Best of luck. Be happy and healthy.

Isar: I suspect there's a lot of laughter in that room where you sit. Enjoy it.

Itzik: I always appreciated your sense of humor and professionalism.

Itamar: You've been an enormous help. You can take some very direct credit for the strides the documenation has taken.

Jeanne: You are perfect in every way. Don't ever change a thing about yourself. It must be love.

Laura: J'ai bien aime avoir une amie avec qui je pourrais practiquer le francais. Je te souhaite la sante et la bonheur.

Lior: Not only have you learned the ropes quickly, but you have also become the main engine of fun in QA.

Mali: You've been a reliable fan of my cooking and recipes. Remember always my unshakeable faith in the resolution of seemingly big problems and a brighter future.

Maxim: Strange as it may seem, I had fun installing the server over and over; you always made it an enjoyable experience.

Menahem: I enjoyed your stories. Thanks also for all the references and people of interest you pointed in my direction.

Michal: (Music in background): Vietnam, Vietnam, Vietnam, Vietnam, Vietnam.

Nirit: More than anyone here, you've given me the courage to aspire to greater things.

Noa: You look so amazing now! Thanks for prodding me along to get things done. Every time we talk, no matter about what, I'm always left with warm feelings.

Ohad: Forget couscous. Eat steak.

Orit: Thanks for saving me from myself, and getting me out of trouble.

Oussama: Onwards Christian Soldier. With whom am I going to debate religion and politics now?

Rami: I reckon we enjoy the same city beaches. Hope you can spread as much cheer in your new place as you did here.

Raviv: As time has gone on, I've grown to really like and admire you. Success clings to you. It's good karma.

Sami: The unsaid says it all. I'll really miss you.

Svet: I hope all our documentation efforts helped you. Thanks for the Russian conversations (as low impact as they were). Best of luck!

Tamar: Dhoom 2 (Bollywood rollerblades) is now out on DVD.

Tomer P: No dejes de praticar y aumentar tu conocimiento de idiomas. Gracias tambien por la musica.

Tomer S: As so often is the case with neighbors, just a passing hello in the hallway, which is rather unfortunate. But you've made your presence felt, and I can certainly tell you that the documentation has seen the benefits of your efforts and cooperation.

Tomer W: How come you're always so happy? Let us in on your secret! Are you Bart in disguise?

Tziki: My fellow traveller, perhaps you have a clearer notion of what I am embarking on. Keep following those dreams…

Tzachi: You deserve congratulations for surviving my endless tirades.

Vadim: Onwards and upwards, you talented guy!

Vitali: Fellow early riser. Thanks for the good conversations and the tips and tricks in Russian.

Yaron: Our sages teach us that the world stands on three things: the Torah, worship of the Almighty, and acts of loving kindness. The world can, and in fact did, exist without the first two. But it couldn't without the third.

Yevgeny: Ve nature.

Yifat: Siamese twins born attached at the heart.

Yuval: A new surprise every day. Thanks.

Zafi: You are only last because this list is in alphabetical order. Thanks for the patience, mentoring and full-throated support. You helped make these past two years memorable in the most positive way.

Four Elections in Israel

25 days till departure

I have been party to four national election campaigns in Israel, which comes to an average of one election cycle every two years. This doesn’t include the municipal campaign that occurred in 2004. In each instance, I voted for a different party.

In 1999, after three years in office, Bibi Netanyahu attempted to fend off a challenge from the Labor Party’s Ehud Barak. Bibi had put a previously promising peace process into the deep freeze. Major cajoling from the Clinton Administration produced some progress from his government, but there was a general feeling that a historic opportunity for peace was being lost on his watch.

Enter Ehud Barak, Israel’s most decorated soldier in its modern history. He walked the walk. He talked the talk. He promised negotiations with the Syrians and Palestinians. And the people went for it. I went for it, voting for both him and the Labor Party ticket for the Knesset (there were two ballots in that election).

Barak took seven months to form a government after winning the election. This should have been a warning sign. He led abortive talks with the Syrians, backing out at the last minute when he realized that a putative deal would never pass his promised referendum. In truth, he lost his greatest opportunity to demonstrate true leadership. Only then did he turn to the Palestinians, and very cynically at that. He led us all to believe that if there was a deal to make, he would make it. He knew there was no deal. But I fault him for leading me on. And for the total anarchy that ensued when his government crumbled.

Elections for prime minister only were held at the beginning of 2001. By that time, Arik Sharon the war criminal was leader of the Likud and the Al Aqsa Intifada was being gleefully ramped up by Arafat, for reasons that I will never fully understand. By the time the elections were actually held, in last-ditch negotiations in Taba, Israel had agreed to hand over 100% of Gaza and 98% of the West Bank for a Palestinian state. While the devil was certainly in the details, war was waged against us for essentially 2% of the West Bank. It boggles the mind.

Moreover, Barak had shown himself to be totally incapable governing in a coalition. Sharon promised to form a national unity government. And the public wanted to punish the Palestinians. They and I picked the right man to do just that.

I had never previously voted for or supported a candidate on the right. But through suicide bombings, the combat was brought onto the streets where I walked. The stated objective was to kill and maim as many civilians as possible. While never losing sight of the ultimate objective of burying the proverbial hatchet and sitting down to cut a deal, there was an immediate need to protect the physical integrity of Israel’s citizenry.

The fabric of life for Palestinians in the Occupied Territories was systematically destroyed. The security barrier began to be built. Defensive Shield laid waste to most government infrastructure. And eventually the suicide bombings petered out.

Sharon then went to the electorate in 2003 promising pretty much more of the same. But in his first two years in office, he showed himself to be a charismatic grandfather figure that a shocked populace found it easy to rally round. At this point, I was an enthusiastic supporter of the old man. But I couldn’t stomach the Likud and its endemic graft and sleaze.

Knowing that he would win, I decided to cast my lot for a minor party that truly represented the ideas that I believe in: The Green Leaf. I got a lot of flak for this. Indeed, the central tenet of the party’s platform is the legalization of cannabis, which is a good idea in itself. Alcohol is legal, and does far more damage. Truly the ultimate gateway drug is nicotine, not weed. And when it comes right down to it, responsible adults should be free to make their own decisions on such matters, without state interference. On this note, the whole subject of legalization speaks to a much larger issue in Israel of freedom of privacy in a near-police state. And it was actually on that principle that I made my choice.

In the event, they didn’t cross the electoral threshold anyway.

Sharon was reelected with a much increased share of the vote and proceeded to announce his plans for disengagement (i.e. withdrawal) from Gaza. If he was popular before, he then soared. Of course the political right did everything to place obstacles in his path. But true to his nickname, the Bulldozer, good old Arik was unstoppable, and indeed, Israel withdrew its soldiers and settlers from Gaza in the summer of 2005.

Sharon then struck out on his own to form a new party, Kadima, which, it was inferred, would lead Israel to disengage from the West Bank as well. Had he not suffered from a massive stroke, he would have led his party to a resounding victory.

He left the country in shock. I considered voting for Kadima, but couldn’t quite bring myself to trust Ehud Olmert, Sharon’s deputy and eventual successor. I had high hopes for Amir Peretz in the Labor Party, being from a union background and putting the social fracture at the forefront of the nation’s political discourse. But in the end, I voted for the left-wing Meretz party, in hopes that they would be included in the coalition, thereby pulling the government leftwards.

Once a major party, under the lackluster leadership of Yossi Beilin, Meretz got a humiliating five seats and was excluded from the government.

Olmert had a huge amount of credit extended to him upon his formal election. He was carrying the disengagement’s mantle. He addressed a joint session of the US Congress, a rare honor given to a foreign leader. But he was not up to the task of governing. With Amir Peretz as defense minister, he launched the disastrous war against Hizbullah in Lebanon in the summer of 2006. He has cold-shouldered Abu Mazen, the one man in the Palestinian Authority who could bring about some kind of meaningful progress in jump starting anything that might remotely resemble a peace process. Like all other Israeli politicians, he is blinded by his ego, arrogance and greed; he now clings to power by a thread. The question now is whether he will jump or be pushed.

Sadly, there is an appalling leadership deficit in Israel. There truly is no one who can do what needs to be done in this country. Politics has become nauseatingly corrupt. To my great chagrin, Bibi Netanyahu looks likely to make a political comeback. He may even be standing against Ehud Barak, in a rerun of the 1999 elections. In sum, there is nothing on the horizon to hope for.

Israelis: stand up and be counted! Demand more of your leaders! You will never get rid of the Palestinians; just making their lives ever more miserable will not make your situation any better. There are huge challenges: income distribution, crumbling public health and education, transport gridlock. And if that isn’t enough for you, there’s Iran. So wake up and smell the hummus.

The Cult

38 days till departure

Yesterday was Purim for Jews and Holi for Hindus. These holidays have some similarity in both their season and their rituals. On Purim, the tradition is to get so drunk that you cannot differentiate between Haman the Wicked and Mordechai the Righteous. On Holi, you are supposed to drink bhang lassis and throw colored powder and paint at others. I still don’t know the religious significance of Holi, but I’d really like to celebrate it just the same.

Alas, commonality in religious traditions across the most disparate and diverse cultures is as human marriage and funeral rites. Many religions celebrate both the winter solstice and spring equinox. Bodhi, Christmas and Hanukah come to mind for the former; Easter and Passover, while hardly exhaustive, make the point for the latter.

Reflecting on the likeness of various faiths in their beliefs, one can also discern a common thread regarding human religious institutions. Using the formula, I could give flight to my just-so-barely suppressed lust for ultimate power by starting my very own new age religion. This could go over particularly well in India, where so many travelers go to find Answers. What are the things I need to get started?

Charismatic Leader
All such movements revolve around a charismatic leader. The Rebbes of various Hasidic courts enjoy almost slavish devotion. Sometimes smallish movements venerate their law-givers even more. Heck, Juche as a religion made Kim Il Sung into a quasi-deity.

The charismatic leader inspires devotion through his greatness, wisdom and holiness. People cleave to the big daddy who promises rewards to the good and punishment to evildoers, and of course attention to the disquiet of the individual follower. As the Messenger, I do feel that a proper personality cult is the order of the day. And I can do the charismatic thing without much ado.

Message of Enlightenment and Salvation
I’ll offer my acolytes a vision of a better world. People are searching for answers. Invariably, over the course of this spiritual quest, answers are provided by those who purport to bestow wisdom. Yet so often, these answers come up short. They are not articulated in a sufficiently accessible manner. They conflict with the vestiges of belief systems ingrained from childhood. And so on.

My doctrine will shorten that cognitive gap between the end of rationality and the beginning of faith; the leap will not have to be so great. You can find the answer through joy. (Breslev or Osho, anyone?)

It goes without saying that achieving the ultimate wisdom, inner peace, and overall enlightenment requires a lifetime of devotion to the cause. Since the doctrine is a rather central element to a religion, obviously I’ll need to flesh this one out a bit. But you get the general idea.

Group Speak
In putting the aforementioned doctrine into practice, I will make an effort to coin neologisms for common use among devotees, thus creating a wink-and-nod bond among the group. This is coupled with the next element.

Distrust of Outsiders
While intolerance of other belief systems is not my style, it could certainly prove handy to employ the former element and others like it to foster a certain distrust of other, let’s say, approaches. That said, I don’t envision any enforcement regime.

Inner Circle or pseudo-Clergy
I finally get it. The entire hierarchy of the Roman Catholic Church now makes perfect sense to me. If the clergy can make itself into the kind yet authoritative big daddy, bolstered by an aura of holy infallibility, assisted by a coterie of handsome young men who are not supposed to have sex ever, the senior clergy can pretty much cherry-pick from all the earthly desires it can manage to lust after. Vast wealth helps, too.

I’m not so ambitious as to aspire to the Church of Rome. But a coterie of 20-30 well groomed disciples would certainly fit the bill.

Alternative Career Change
Who am I fooling here? Whatever religious doctrine I could come up with, fertile imagination notwithstanding, would be a load of bunk in the final analysis. Without meaning disrespect to anyone’s beliefs, at the end of the day, isn’t it all? Don’t we all cozy up to those particular parts of religious doctrine that appeal to us most? And downplay the more bothersome bits (until we are exhorted to rely on faith in the face of it)? I could not be the leader of a movement whose doctrine I did not fully subscribe to, even if I invented it myself.

Fortunately, there will soon be a job opening which has all the romantic ideological trappings of my misspent youth. As we all know, Fidel Castro is on the ropes. How agreeable to be the benevolent dictator of a pleasant Caribbean island!

A little analysis brings me rapidly to the conclusion that I am eminently qualified for the position:

• I speak Spanish
• I can do the charismatic leader shtick
• I like the tropical climate
• I like to eat yellow rice, black beans and pork
• I can dance salsa
• I think that some modified version of socialism, while having its costs, is a just and utilitarian economic model
• I wouldn’t mind thumbing my nose at the current world order
  

Indeed, I could get used to being addressed as El Presidente. It becomes me. And I get all the perks of power, without feeling sheepish about it.

Any advice on how to proceed?